Penton: NHL coaches usually not unemployed too long
By Bruce Penton
When Minnesota Wild fired coach Dean Evason in late November after a miserable start (5-10-4) to the 2023-24 season, they didn’t have to struggle too long to find a replacement.
John Hynes, who had earlier National Hockey League coaching stints with New Jersey Devils and Nashville Predators, was experienced, successful and, best of all as far as the Wild were concerned, available.
Why Hynes was fired after four seasons in Nashville is somewhat of a mystery. He had four straight winning seasons — 134-96-18 from 2019-20 through 2022-23 — but word out of Nashville is that lack of playoff success (or no playoffs at all in 2022-23) was the reason for his dismissal.
Being fired as a coach in the NHL is usually not a career-killer. Only two of the top 50 winningest bench bosses coached only one team — Toe Blake in Montreal, who made the playoffs every year from 1955 to 1968; and Jon Cooper, currently the coach of the Tampa Bay Lightning, who has been in charge since the 2012-13 season and has a couple of Stanley Cups to his credit.
Currently, 12 of the NHL’s 32 teams are being run by first-time head coaches. The other 20 teams are using ‘veteran’, ‘experienced’, ‘seasoned’ or ‘retreads.’ Choose your description.
Some of the coaches with the most lengthy NHL resumes are John Tortorella, currently with his fifth team in Philadelphia; Rick Bowness in Winnipeg, whose Jets are his sixth team; Rangers’ boss Peter Laviolette, also with his sixth team; and Paul Maurice in Florida, who has had six different head-coaching jobs, but two of the six were in Carolina,
Six different coaching jobs might sound like a lot, but it pales in comparison to the eight jobs held by Mike Keenan (Philly, Chicago, Rangers, St. Louis, Vancouver, Boston, Florida and Calgary) and Roger Neilson (Toronto, Buffalo, Vancouver, L.A. Kings, Rangers, Florida, Philadelphia and Ottawa). Neilson has the best hiring/firing story, falling victim to the whim/idiocy of former Toronto owner Harold Ballard, who fired Neilson on a Thursday in 1979 after a 2-1 loss to Chicago, the team’s fourth straight defeat. Problem was, Ballard didn’t have a replacement coach lined up and over the next 48 hours, he was turned down by a handful of prospective coaches. Desperate, Ballard rehired Neilson in time for Saturday night’s nationally televised game, but asked Neilson to wear a paper bag over his head so viewers wouldn’t know the coach’s identity until the puck was dropped. To his credit, Neilson said no to his boss’s ridiculous request, and carried on coaching for the rest of the season, at which time he was fired for real.
The oldest phrase in the world of hockey is that ‘coaches are hired to be fired.” It’s never more real than in the NHL With an additional few words: “… and likely to be rehired.”
Headline at the Canadian parody website, The Beaverton: “John Tortorella convenes press conference to talk about how much he hates press conferences.”
Former Oilers’ coach John Muckler, quoted in Steve Simmons column in SunMedia, about those great Gretzky-Messier-Coffey-Fuhr teams of the 80s never winning nine or more in a row: “Those ’80s teams couldn’t go nine games without finding a party.”
Joel Beall of golfdigest.com., doing a review of 2023 and a look-ahead to 2024: “We usually don’t condone violence but each tour player should get to punch one fan per year who yells anything gambling-related at them.”
Headline at fark.com: “Randy Moss shares his pick for the greatest wide receiver of all time and, surprisingly, it’s Randy Moss.”
Headline at the onion.com: “Silhouette Of Chainsaw, Blowtorch Visible Through NFL Injury Tent”
Super 70s Sports, in the aftermath of the $700 million Shohei Ohtani signing by the Dodgers, ran a picture of actor Lee Majors and said: “The Dodgers could’ve built 116 bionic men instead.”
Steve Simmons of SunMedia, on the Blue Jays’ off-season inactivity: “You can’t love what’s happened this off-season with (Blue Jays’ management) Ross Atkins and Mark Shapiro unless you love stadium renovations.”
Comedy writer Alex Kaseberg: “Aaron Rodgers is so far out of his league in trying to exchange funny barbs with Jimmy Kimmel. So, Aaron, go put your hair in a man-bun, lie about getting vaccinated and get into the concussion protocol right away.”
RJ Currie of sportsdeke.com:”Tennis pro Pablo Cuevas continues to draw fire for taking the 2017 Brazil Open title with an underhand serve on match point. ‘Nothing wrong with winning underhanded,’ said Bill Belichick.”
From fark.com, after the Blue Jays signed Isiah Kiner-Falefa to a two-year contract: “Bob Costas, defender of America’s pastime, shades utility player IKF by saying (‘no disrespect intended’) if you’re paying the IKFs of the world $15 million for two years, baseball is in fine financial health.”
Steve Simmons again: “Aaron Rodgers is on a short list of both the greatest quarterbacks to ever play and the least likeable human beings around.”
Care to comment? Email brucepenton2003@yahoo.ca